joi, 8 ianuarie 2015

Why can`t we all just get along ? (part 1)

You hear frequently the need of being a good team player, in every company there is , because well most of the companies work themselves up through teams; sales teams,marketing teams,Q&A teams,HR teams, management teams ... And so on.
Every layer of a company, be it from the group of cleaning ladies to the group of owners/CEO's is defined by the word TEAM.
The strategy to function through this system of teaming is really simple and efficient. 
An old Romanian saying implied : where there is just one there is no power but where there are two the power increases... Or we could say alone we could do so little but together we could do so much.
So therefore ,in order for the cleaning part in a company to be well delivered , the cleaning ladies should work together as a machine to get the work done...same thing goes for CEOs or managers... 

But what brings this "divide et impera" strategy down?
Because in companies (and not only) that is what teamwork is about, dividing a mass of employers in sole-purpose groups in order to get the best out of themselves to reach the same unique goal. 

Therefore we get to this, IDENTITY. Every team has its own identity. But how can you manage to reach out to let's say 5-6 individuals,having their own and unique identities, to get themselves to merge into one defining thing?
You might say that the purpose the team has might be congruent with its identity. And i would say you are mistaken, for example the sales team , must sell, must meet a quota every month/trimester/year,must bring new contracts/leads and so on... The sole purpose is to sell,right? That is the basic and wanted thing to do for a sales team.
But see, from 5-6 individuals forming a sales team,because we used this example, you won't get the same thing; one will sell like crazy, one will suck badly but he is open to learn, one might have good or bad days , one is good at prospecting and one is just wasting his time and your time as a manager of that team because she/he doesn``t care much.
So what do you have there? 6 different approaches/attitudes in a team serving the common purpose of selling. How can you merge that into forming an identity for your team?

Let's use an example for this example. You have a family , mom , dad, two kids and an annoying mother in law living with you. What's the purpose in a family? You have a hard time naming just one of course, let me try, i would say the biggest one is holding the other one`s back in good or bad times.
Every member of the family has his/her`s identity of course, dad is always tired and moody, mom is even more tired and moodier but she keeps it as a secret very good, one kid is very smart and disciplined and the other one is not and wastes his time in clubs and the mother in law is too old to care anymore so she just wines all day about everyone.
So there , you have the different attitudes from each member, but they function as a whole which is not identified only by the name or purpose , this whole it is also identified by the way they work together in order to get there.

So you'll say "OK,so what?"

Simple, in the family example there is a thing to consider. Trust. They trust themselves and well in a team trust is the most important thing to achieve. Teamwork starts right there. And to get those individuals to start trusting each other you should help them overcome the fear of vulnerability. And to achieve that you must be honest with yourselves first, in every family there is "dirty laundry" and as well every team in every company has it too.
Don`t be afraid to point to that dirty laundry , make it shine again! No member of your team will be really on board to pursue the goal you share if he won`t feel that he is listened or if he feels he cannot share his thoughts.
It is all about TRUST.

"It had taken time for him to realize that no one was truly self-sufficient, and that those who thought they were merely took refuge in a form of weakness, the weakness of being unable to ask for help and guidance and thus find greater strength in reliance on close friends and comrades. " - Simon Hawke, The Romulan Prize (Star Trek: The Next Generation )

duminică, 28 decembrie 2014

This one "is about time!"

Time is unrelenting. No one can't speed it, no one can't stop it... And God! how much we would love to freeze it sometimes,right?

But we can't. We are made of time... Time is what forms us, time is giving us shape, time is giving us a voice.. but it also shuts us up or destroys us.
So if we know that outcome or at least expect it anyway.. Why are we so eager to fight it? We cannot win evidentely. We can get to what we desire or what we expect but we cannot control the amount of time until that happens.

So what am i saying, that we should just give up? You would ask...

Of course we shouldn't. 
But time has to be embraced not fought against. It should be used in your favour. Because yes, we might not control it, we might not speed it ... But we defentely can use it in our advantage. 

So that is the what... Where is the how , right? 

Right in your hands.

So what if it will pass a lot of time until you get or achieve something? 
Don't give up! Time will pass anyway.
So why would you stop? 
One should never stop... You will never get to catch it up but at least you won't be static. If you are static how can you deal with something that is moving continously?

You just can't. 

Don't abandon you dreams, your expectations... Time has a long road designed for you... And how will you be able to discover it if you stop and don't walk it through?
That road is only yours to have. 

That's the thing you should fight for!

Never stop! Take everything! Everything is yours to have!

vineri, 21 noiembrie 2014

Bring it on!

When life gives you a hard time... just say "Bring it on!" 

This choice of words is meant to describe those moments when life seems overwhelming and you are at your downess... 
But unlike in my title, most of us, instead of fighting it ... We just give into it. And well , when we are negative and have a failure anticipation attitude about us and our lives .. what does that attract ?
More negativity.And of course, failure.

Just say : "Bring it on!" ... "You cannot take me down! I am strong and i will deal with all your obstacles with dignity and grace."

I am not talking here about optimism and faith. There is a fine line between that and being completely idiotic.

Most of us are confused by being positive and by being optimistic. They go around the same circle evidentely but it doesn t mean that they have equall meanings.
So let me try to draw a wall between them :

Positive thinking : it is when you focus on the present goodness of your life and you see the beauty and the prosperity that you desire from your future as a fact;as something that you are gonna get eventually because you know that if you are positive you will attract positive things in your life. Simple law of attraction,  right ?

Optimism : is when you see both positive and negative parts of your life but you focus on hoping for the best. So there , being optimistic implies hope and faith while being positive is (or it should be) a constant state of mind without implying other feelings.

So why are people afraid of being positive and to trust themselfs? To trust they deserve good things? 

Why do we all crave for goodnees but are teriffied of embracing it?? Why is easier to give into sorrow?

I cannot even sum out all the people that walked my life asking me how the hell can i still be positive with all the crap that i deal with. 
It's really simple really. I don't want to get deeper into it. Getting deeper into it will be worse. 

You know what? Most people waste their lifes thinking them through and falling in their traps(and how many traps are there!) and they forget a very important thing : TO LIVE !

I have been there myself... I was so bad into it ... And nothing good came out it. My mind was so busy developing negative thoughts and thinking and mostly FEARING that the worst will get to me .. And well i anticipated failure. And guess what ?

I failed badly.

So it got me thinking, i was doing what i was always doing... And well.. I had what i have always had. 
Nothing in common with what i desired for myself of course.

Again.. Simple law of attraction.

So how about instead of crying over those bank debts that drawn money from you monthly ( debts you made by your decisions .. Decided by the bad circumstances you once encountered) focus on the health you are blessed with ? Health that will help you survive everything? 
How about focusing on the luck you have of being loved by someone ? Ever thought you might be the most important person in someone's life?
Have you ever been grateful for being gifted with so much life... For waking up in the morning with a new chance at hand to make it better?!

How about saying "Bring it on!" And do something different today , something your future self with be grateful for!